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When you hit the "Send it!" button the page will reload and your letter will have been added to the bottom of this page. Please understand that when/if you fill in your name, e-mail address, and URL, they will appear here with your note. Also, there seems to be a limit to how big a guestbook entry can be --- if you have a lot to say then it may be better to do it through e-mail, and tell me that you want me to post it on the response pages. And I want to thank each of you for taking the time to respond here.
This new guestbook was started on 7/8/97. You can read the older ones and all the response pages too -- the link to responses at the top of the page will get you there. I read the story and I feel so sad. I wish I could have been his friend, I would have understood and helped him. The story about Bill is sad, very sad! However, it is also important to let as many as possible read the story about Bill. That is why I have a link to it stored on my home page. Dear Gabi I have always been a supporter of people's right to chose the way they love one another and I shall always oppose hate... no matter how it manifests itself. Thanks for the tear of love for this boy, you have touched my heart. ACE I'm truly sorry about the loss of your son. Your story will forever be in my heart.
Note from Gabi: there was an ignornant and hateful entry here from someone who signed it as 'God Follower'. I have erased it from the guestbook -- that kind of stuff is NOT welcome here. Linda's entry (below) is in reply to the one I have removed -- Thanks Linda! Thanks for telling Bill's story. It's terribly hard to be "different" even if that only means being true to yourself. I will pray for your son and for you. Dear Gabi, I am going to try and tell you what it felt like to be that person always knowing that everyone else was a sinner- always being able to judge others by MY Christian standards. By studying the Bible and always praying for everyone else to drink less or swear less or not be homosexual or whatever the perceived sin, I was truly thinking that I was perfect and that everyone else is a sinner! Your story touched me deeply. My sincerest condolences on the loss of your son. You have my respect and admiration for creating this site as it has helped so many others. I am an aspiring writer (not published yet) who has been researching hate crimes as a story idea (I'm not copying yours; I had a previous idea before I read your touching story.) During my ongoing research, I have been amazed, appalled and driven to tears by the homophobia and crimes perpetuated by it in our society. Although I am a married woman, I am deeply supportive of the les-bi-gay & transgendered community, and of their friends and families. I add my voice to yours and your readers in the fight against intolerance and hatred. Best of luck to you all. Lovely tribute to your son. I was assaulted myself 10 years ago. I am a lesbian, and was stunned by the attack. I spendt many years in therapy, to address my own internalized homophobic ideas. I attempted to report the crime, however, this was a time of "closeted" lifestyles within the community, especially the lesbian community. I wonder, if there are other lesbians are out there who have had a similar experience? i want to tell you how moved i am - more than words can tell at this moment because i do not have the strength to say it right now In the quiet of the night, let our candle always burn. Gabi, I must admit that I was homophobic and very anti-gay myself until a few years ago. Although I never did more than teasing, I now realize that this can be very hard on a person. I have grown a lot since my youth and I have learned to accept all people regardless of differences. I feel truly sorry for your loss but I will carry the story of your son with me till the day I die. I am a gay youth from the Washington D.C. area who is currently beginning to get attention as a poet. I would like, and hope you would not mind, if I could write a poem dedicated to your son called "Hold Back the Dawn." This is so important to me, because your son sounds so much like a boy I knew who has since disappeared into the foster care system and that I haven't been able to locate. The same suicidal thoughts, the same horrific bashing. Thank you for taking the time to put together this page. It is an extremely important resource for all people everywhere, gay or straight. I am a gay youth from the Washington D.C. area who is currently beginning to get attention as a poet. I would like, and hope you would not mind, if I could write a poem dedicated to your son called "Hold Back the Dawn." This is so important to me, because your son sounds so much like a boy I knew who has since disappeared into the foster care system and that I haven't been able to locate. The same suicidal thoughts, the same horrific bashing. Thank you for taking the time to put together this page. It is an extremely important resource for all people everywhere, gay or straight. He who hates another commites the greates sin of all. He who hates another commites the greates sin of all. I have just spent quite some time reading Bill's story. I must admit that initially I did not want to read it, I had an impression that it was going to be very sad. People all the while are capable of the cruelist deeds. The worst is when individuals are persecuted over their nature to love someone of the same sex. Unfortunatly this persecution always has it's greatist impact on the youngest. It can only be when children are brought up to the idea that same sex relationships are as natural as those they see in their own homes and families that tghis ignorance can be irradicated. They need to grow up in a society where they, on a day to day basis see two men kissing and think nothing odd of it, where a man might say he is married and not assume his partners name is Mary, Johanna or Lisa but that it may equally be Tom, George or Mike. I have just spent quite some time reading Bill's story. I must admit that initially I did not want to read it, I had an impression that it was going to be very sad. People all the while are capable of the cruelist deeds. The worst is when individuals are persecuted over their nature to love someone of the same sex. Unfortunatly this persecution always has it's greatist impact on the youngest. It can only be when children are brought up to the idea that same sex relationships are as natural as those they see in their own homes and families that tghis ignorance can be irradicated. They need to grow up in a society where they, on a day to day basis see two men kissing and think nothing odd of it, where a man might say he is married and not assume his partners name is Mary, Johanna or Lisa but that it may equally be Tom, George or Mike. Hi everyone. Gabi, You have done a wonderful thing by creating this web page. It gives honor to your son, and spreads the message of what fear and hate in our world can accomplish. Thank you for sharing bills story it truely touched my like no other. I sometimes wish I can hold back the dawn but after reading bills story i realize that we can all shine some good light and we often do. i hope to see a world where people will at least let other people be themselves...but i think not...after reading many derogatory statements; i thought i could not be surprised, or shal....welll....who am i kidding?? LOL....good luck with ur site.... Bill's story moved me to tears. I wish that every gay child's parents were as sensitive and truly accepting as you. Thank you for sharing your son's life and death with us all... and I hope that it accomplishes what you hope: to open the eyes of people who allow homophobia to continue through ignorance and inaction. Thank you for having the courage and presence to post Bill's story here. Thinking of others in the midst of your own tragedy is both a way to help yourself and an incredible service to anyone else who has experienced anything similar. i found this page very saddening. i am also bisexual and i know how hard it was for bill to come out. i hope his spirit has found rest and stay that way and for the people who has harmed him i hope they get what they deserve A very touching tribute. This memorial to your son should help countless others. A very touching tribute. This memorial to your son should help countless others. Very inspiring and touching site. I can easily relate a period of my life where I shared Bill's turmoil. I only wish he realized how blessed he was to have such strong and intelligent parents like yourselves. It's a quality that those of us "survivors" will always envy.
I am Noel's friend, I spent that evening at College waiting by the phone to hear Noel's voice on phone... An evening of waiting, memories I will never forget... I never met Bill but he has touched my life deeply, in ways I am unable to voice... So many lives have been touched by this family, not the least of which is my own. Our lives at College have become very different since the night we sent Noel to Olympia yet the bond our group created will never be broken because of the love and respect we have for each other and the way we live our lives. I enjoyed reading about Bill :) I am 15 and not openly gay, but after reading your son's life story I feel so sad for you. It made me cry so hard. I can relate to it in many ways, but I have learned to accept myself. Some days I wish I was out so I could openly support people like you who are so supportive. I wish I could explain how I felt after reading that, but it left me speachless. I hope you keep up the progress you have made on openly supporting gay/bi. Sorry! I was so choked up by the story I forgot to put my email address on the other email. Your son's story hit me hard............ I just finished Bill's Story and I just can't comprehend the hate that causes tragedies like these. My heart goes out to those who love Bill. Bill's story touched me very deeply. I can only hope that through living who we are, as gay men and women, as loving friends, family, and neighbors, the world will come to accept us. Your courage has been an inspiration to me. I wish you and your family the very best, and I want you to know that there are many people who join you in the fight against hate and bigotry. Sorry...I left out a t in the email address. I'm sorry for what happened, and don't understand why people are like that, only hope that they can change. WOW, thanks for taking the time to produce and share your personal experience. I also work on equity for LGB youth in the schools. I'd like to be at the GLSTN conference coming up, but it's uncdertain that I'll make it at this point. Anyhow my address is 409B Tower Road, Nelson, B.C. V1L 3K6 Phone (250)354-1885 for any who wish to share experience/information. Your son's story truly inspires me. I am a college student in the process of coming out. I have never been gay-bashed and I consider myself lucky. My major is in government and I want to be a lobbyist for not just gay rights but, human rights. Thanks for sharing Bill's story and my heart goes out to you. I would just like to say that I enjoyed the information that you have put in this web page. You have done a great job and I appreciate you being there for us. Thanks again, and my heart goes out to Bill's family./ Hi Gabi.. Always looking for your updates. Thanks again for this site, it kind of says it all and makes me think about my life and the ones around us. Hi... Dear Gabi, A very touching and sad story, but it is good to see that you are and will come to grips with the loss of your son. I just dont know what to say... Your story really touched me, deep in my heart. My heart goes out to you for the loss of your son. I lost my brother to AIDS in 1996 and whoever said it gets easier with time...well...I don't think they really knew. You learn to cope but it NEVER gets easier. Hang in there and please continue to educate those around you. I have no words really, to express how I feel right now. I saw the pictures of your son and I couldn't believe someone so beautiful was so troubled and so sad. Dear Gabi, Your homepage touched me in a way I have not felt in quite awile now. In reading "Bill's Story," I shed two tears. I believe those tears were shed for two reasons. One was for the pain that both he and those around him felt and the second was for the beauty that it seems Bill was. I am sorry he and your family had to endure this heartache, but I believe much good did come out of this tragedy. Thank you so much for sharing this story with me. If you do not mind, I am going to link it to my homepage so that others can feel what I have felt. Thank you from the deoths of my heart. I just happened to stumble upon this homepage but am i ever glad I did... just wanted to say thank you...i wish i could have known Bill. I am soryy for your loss, I wish I had the love and support from my family that you gave yours. Take good care of yourself. Dear Gabi, Note: There were two hateful entries snipped here. ~~~ Gabi Although I have read your story several times, this is the first time I have written. What a tragedy that any human has to fight for the basic right to love another person! What a tragedy that any human has to explain the choice of whom he or she loves. We need to value our young people and be role models. Your story provides so many reasons for all of us to care about each other, and to lend a helping hand. Thank you. Hope this is a lesson to all people who Gabi--What beautiful, gifted sons you have! The story is particularly hard for me to read just now, as I just learned Friday that a former student of mine recently committed suicide. It is incredibly painful to know that someone you cared for and would have gladly helped left the world feeling hopeless, defeated, and alone. Thank you for dispelling the silence, which is so dangerous to us all. I wish your son could have found the strength to hold on. You are a wonderful family. The story of your son deeply touches me. Partly this is because I am a soon-to-be 17 year old bisexual girl. I came out when I was 13. I have recently become less and less aware of how common this kind of hate crime is, especially towards teens. I was only led to this page after hearing of a close friend of my gay-youth-listserv peer, who was beaten severely after coming out to his school. All of these stories make me want to do something, but I am frustrated and upset because I don't know what. What happened to Bill is terrible, and I wished I could have met him, if only because we seem so alike, and not just in terms of sexual orientation. I wish my deepest sympathies for you, Bill's family, and invite anyone who reads this and has an idea of change to email me. I guess we can only do it one person, one body, one mind at a time. 22 years ago, I was staying at a friend's house when her son and his two friends began charging out of her house, announcing they were going to go beat up "fags". I went ballistic. "Why do you think you have the right to do violence to a person for being who he or she is?" "How dare you go out and do such a thing?" "How would you like knowing people felt they had a right to beat you up because you are who you are?" "There is NOTHING wrong with being gay, and it takes real strength to be gay in the face of people and society like you!" And so on. After a good 45 minutes of my nonstop, steamroller haranguing, they sheepishly gave up the idea. More than 10 years later, I learned to my astonishment that one of the young men was, himself, gay, and had been going along as self-protection. My words were what gave him the courage to come out, to himself and to the world. It was here in Olympia, and I wish I knew who he was. Years later I found out my own brother was gay. I have an even longer history with gay people, including drag queens, which is interesting and powerful. If you'd like to hear more, please e-mail me. I really sympathize with BILLY. Maybe I will be more courage to be. Hi Gabi!!! It's Shaun!! I'm at my school address, so it's hard for me to send direct mail to you through your homepage. How is everything?? I miss our morning chats and stuff. I can't wait to meet you face to face!! A week and a half left!! Talk to you soon!! All my love, Such a beautiful young man. I feel the pain that pushed him to his desperate act, so needless,,,,and the great pain of his loving family. How sad it is to contemplate that this is just the tip of an iceberg. Great love to you and yours. Bion I wish I had words for you. Please know that my heart is with you. I was very moved by this site, and will publicize it on my own so that more good can come of such a terrible event. I hope that it spreads a message of love, tolerance and communication to all who see it. It certainly did here. My deepest condolences on the loss of your son. It seems no matter where we go there will always be the people who "give life," "lives life," and the people who "take it away." It sounds too me like Bill was one of the givers. I wish I could have known him. Good luck on a worth while cause. Thank you for sharing what you did about your son - it makes it easier to fight back, a little. Not easier, maybe. Clearer.. I just wish there were more people in the world like your son. The only thing is, I not so sure the world deserves them. What a touching story! Thank you for the tears ... What was done to Bill and Gabi was bad enough. But when I read the letter Gabi received from the Lions' organization and found that it was "good" CDC proticol, my blood boiled. It is the I am so sorry for your and the world's loss. As a gay man in S.Georgia, I told fear reprisals for who I am. It is a tough world for teenagers as it is. It is especially hard for those who are gay/bi/transgendered. I was moved by your story and hope that it quits being repeated the world over. Your sons story really touched me. I came upon it by accident and left with tears in my eyes. Good luck. If only we can stop the hate.... Never stop telling your tragic, yet beautiful story. It moved me to tears. May we all keep your son's memory alive by continuing the work of eradicating hate and show the world that who we are and how we love "Just is."
I found your story to be a very, very enlightening one. Today, at the age of 34, I look back upon MY teen years and my sexuality at that time. I was a very closeted lesbian who never dreamed of "coming out" for the same fearful reasons that your son experienced. I am now fortunate to work for Lotus Development Corporation; a place where I can be who I am OPENLY. Your story reminded me that there is still much to do to change the climate of hate in this country. Thank you for sharing your tragic story. Hey there Gabi, Hi everyone. I am SO far behind in writing to you all to thank you for signing this guestbook. I get so much strength from you all! As I live I know Bill's pain. I am awed that you could see through your pain to write the tribute to your son. As a teacher in a small town I fight hate every day. Bless you - and thank you. I removed an entry here because I recieved this note:
It has come to my attention that a friend of mine played a bit of a practical joke on me. He wrote to your server concerning your son using my name and e-mail address and made a disrespectful comment to gays in general. I would seriously appreciate it if you removed this comment from the server. Bill's story reminded me of another gay teen who has recently committed suicide. Jacob Orosco fought the Salt Lake City Board of Education and the state of Utah for the right to create a gay-straight alliance group at his high school. On Sept. 3, 1997, he killed himself. A webpage in his memory has been created at http://www.xmission.com/~sam3915/jacob_orozco.html I started the search on the web for info re: hate crimes after watching a movie. I came across this and want you to know that I will spread yours and Bills message among my community. No More Hate In the quietness of the morning mists, or whilst the sunlight blue skies shall kiss: In the evening's dusky hues or in my nightime's lightless mews: I shall think of all of you I shall think of Bill. Thank you, the Clayton family, for your courage to speak and to act,... for your love that understood and accepted... for your loyalty that refuses to do other than to honour a young and precious life. My Dearest Gabi, Dear Gabi, My love, I think it took a lot of courage to write this story about your son and I'm thankful you did.He sounds like a wonderful person and I'm very sorry for your loss. Gabi, my dear friend- we have been here before and we will go there again. We are two of the luckiest people in the world because our eyes have been opened, our hearts have rejoiced, we know the truth- and the truth has set us free. We will not stop spreading the word. There is still so much hate, so much stupidity in this world and I vow with you to keep passing the message and spreading the word...one heart at a time. I am also a bi-sexual teen. Bill's story really meant a lot to me. I have had many problems like him, and I hope to come out one day. I can't stand hiding my identity. I can't act like myself when only a few people know the truth. Bill will always be in my prayers. Gabi, My heart goes out to Bill's family and friends who have to endure such a Working on law enforcement training concerning hate crime. Would like to publish (State of California) a reader for police trainees focusing on not the hate crime laws, rather, impact on hate crimes on real people. Any stories appreciated, especially disabled victims, California victims. Thanks. People really show their ignorance when they base actions on the emotion of hate. When will this stop. It is a cruel world out there, and some people just don't get it, its okay for people to be what they want to be, without having to be beaten for it. I am truly sorry for you Billy and may God Bless You and hold you forever, and God bless you to Bill's Family. With Love & Respect I really don't know what to say after reading this... I'm an out of the closet homosexual , and i'm from a very very small town. It sounds as though your son and i had many of the same beliefs, and unfortunately - the same problems... I can't imagine the pain you, as a parent, have gone through after this ordeal... I mean, i didn't even know him, and i can barely see through my tears right now... I just wanted you to know that i think this is a very kind, and beneficial thing you're doing... Blessed Be, Daniel. Gabi-- Your story touched me. So many of us Thanks! I am going to send this valuable story to everyone I know Gabi, family, friends, Hello, I work for a youth project for gay,lesbial, and bi-sexual youth 14-24yrs. The story was quiet moveing, and my eyes welled up whil reading it. The kids I work with live the hate each day but I must say I feel like ther has been some progres. I attribute it to people like you who have chosen not to remain silent, for this I thank you. I just wish that it was not caused by a great loss. I am going to give a copy of this to my colleges at the youth project and to some classmates that want to learn about servicing gay and lesbian youth. Stephen I would jsut like to express my thanks for your strength trhough out this tradedy in your own life. I am a junior at Hope College, in Holland Michigan. It is very conservative, and very homophobic. While some support from faculty members is given, the student body lacks such enlightenment. On behave of all those trying to change the world for gay and lesbian individuals... |