Name:
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: Indiana
Time: 1999-03-14 09:24:21
Comments: Dear Gabi, If only all children were to have family as loving and supportive as Bill has. I can draw up memories of ten years ago (when I was stalked and raped) as though it were this morning. Luckily, I too had a family who gathered the strength to keep me alive and fighting back. It wasn't easy for them because they discovered my sexual orientation (GWM)at the time of my attack. The police in our area basically ignored the fact that a crime had been comitted because the man who beat and raped me (I was hospitalized for three weeks) was someone who I had been in a two year relationship four years prior. They did discover that he been staying in a closet in my attic for a weeek and a half prior to the attack. I had called the police two times that week because I felt someone had been in my apartment (some pictures broken and some plants dumped) but since nothing was stolen nothing was done. In the end he served three months for breaking and entering and criminal tresspass. He confessed that he was actually in the closet when the police "checked" the attic the day before the attack. I believe their shame in missing him resulted in what few charges were filed. I had left this person because he could not accept himself for who he was let alone accept "US". In the end I think he was as much a victem as I was. I was twenty two then and it's taken me a long time to trust anyone outside my family unit. If I had been female there would have been bigger strides toward justice. If I had been female there would have been more alternatives to turn to for help. If I had been female... of course if I had been female chances are that I wouldn't have gone through what I did at all. Not that I wouldn't have been attacked, rape is a crime of violence that can threaten us all, but I would not have been the victem of a hate crime by the "law enforcement" agency that handled my case. My physical bruises healed but the scarring placed upon me after the attack are still tender to the touch. I pray that no other person - hetro, homo, bi, male, female, black or white has to endure what your Bill or myself had to go through. My heart goes out to you. Keep spreading the word. "Adia"

Name: Derek Choate
Website:
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From:
Time: 1999-03-14 06:58:41
Comments: I would like to thank both the contributors and the organization who makes this page possible. In my opinion it is poeple such as yourselves who will truely make this world wonderful and beautiful for all.

Name: Tzvi & Drew
Website: it's still new
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: NY
Time: 1999-03-13 22:47:34
Comments: Thank you for sharing Bill's story. It has special meaning for us, as gay parent.

Name: Saul Zemke
Website: Saul Zemke's WebPage
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: USA
Time: 1999-03-12 04:15:12
Comments: Hello, I have read about Bill. I am certain that you loved him greatly, and still do. You talk about Bill being extremely depressed a lot of the time. I understand, and I have also had a great amount of experience with self-depression. I have been suicidal before, and I often think about it. But I have overpower these feelings, I will never do it. I have greatly growth mentally, and I often hope to help others. I have a great understanding for what could have been feeling through his life. No, I am not Gay myself, but my depression and sense of self-hatred keeps me going to want to help others before they get to the point were they can't take life and its misery anymore. I my not be able to help anybody, or a may be full of it. but if a can help at least one person in life, I can handle a life of misery. I am proud of you to keep the memory of Bill alive through this webpage, that takes a lot of courage and bravery, including the fact of you had to think of Bill every second you constructed this page. That takes guts. I am extremely proud of you all. People like you are the true heros in life.

Name: Jason J. Almonte
Website: Jason's Humanist Poetry Page
Referred by: Lycos
From: New York City
Time: 1999-03-11 05:52:14
Comments: Dear Mrs. Clayton, I have never been moved to such emotion as I just was by your eloquent words and heart-felt sentences. As these tears roll down my cheek, I am awed at how a three year old web-page can set free the emotion, anger, and disappointment pent up in my heart. I think upon my own life, and at how-at 20 years old-I have grown so tired of fighting and struggling. Even in a metropolis like New York City, discrimination runs rampant. I was recently diagnosed with Hodgkin's disease last August. A nurse at a very reputable hospitable had the gall to tell me (since I was gay), "Well, look at the way you live. You should've been expecting something bad to happen to you. You didn't think that God would let you get away.." I am going to try to set aside thoughts like those for the moment to really let you feel the love that your words extended to me. I feel a genuine love and compassion for Bill and you, and for others...We must change this place...before things get out of hand. I have written a poem on how "Bill's Story" has affected me. If you would like to see it, my web page is at http://pages.bolt.com/poetry/jason_joaquin1/index.html Remember, "The ramifications of even the smallest of our actions cannot be fathomed today because they-even in a thousand years-will not have reached full maturity. As neither will my soul..." I wrote that... Again, thank you for reminding me that I AM NOT alone... Jason J. Almonte

Name: Tomi Smith
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: Illinois
Time: 1999-03-11 05:13:24
Comments: Mrs. Clayton, Thank you! Thank you for sharing your son, and the effects of his tragic death. I, myelf, am openly gay and have been for a few years. I am 23 now and thank God and caring people like you I have not had that kind of abuse your son and family had to endure. However, I did grow up in a very abusive household, wereas, I do understand hate and violence. My mother is very supportive of me and my life. I do agree with your son, It is not my choice to be gay. But it is my right to be open. I wanted to thank you mainly for your love for your son, but not only that, your support of him and his life. No matter the cost. It took me several years to recover, somewhat, from my father's abuse (physical, mental, and emotional). I only wish that I would have known you when I despertly wanted to come out. I knew from an early stage in life that I was "differant". The abuse that ensued from my father I believe was a direct impact on how he precieved me. I feel that he knew and tried to "change" me. I'll never know the truth, and never know if my father loved me inspite of who or what I am. Simply put, my father, like your son, Killed himself when I was twelve. So my life has been touched by that aspect as well. I felt I had no support. In school I was unattentive, and somewhat withdrawn. I didn't feel close to anyone not even at home. I felt as though I were on the out side looking in on life. I am still struggling with other aspects of my life, suchas, who am I really. I feel sometimes I was robbed of my personality from an early age. I am still searching. I would appreciate it if you would like to get in contact with me, so that maybe with your help and knowledge, I may be able to become complete. Yours is the family structure and unity that only occurs in my fantasies. Again, Thank You and God Bless. Tomi

Name: Derek Carpenter
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: Washington, D.C.
Time: 1999-03-10 22:10:43
Comments: Hi Mrs. Clayton, I was led to your site by way of Jasbits (www.jas.com). I saw the pictures of your son and "1978-1995". Wondering what could've happened to such a handsome young man, I was intrigued. Weaving my way through the links, I found your very well-written story of the events surrounding Bill's death. It saddened me, moved me, made me thankful and made me want to say "something" to you. To keep it short and sweet, I'll just say Bill was VERY fortunate to have such a supportive and loving family (and friends). That's what pleased me the most. A note: I faced the irrational discrimination during a Red Cross blood drive at my job a few years ago. I felt humiliated. Mind you I've always tested negative. I wish you and the family peace and happiness. DC

Name: Jill Andersen
Referred by: Yahoo!
From: Seattle
Time: 1999-03-09 03:18:20
Comments: Your story touched me very deeply. I am writing a speech for my college public speaking class about gay violence in schools and I just happened upon your story in my research. It made me cry. Thank you for sharing your story; know that it helps.

Name: i do not condone fags
Website: fuckyou
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: the usa,,asshole
Time: 1999-03-08 13:57:48
Comments: sorry but thats the way it is,,read the bible!!??

Name: Jon
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: Wyoming
Time: 1999-03-08 04:51:14
Comments: WOW your story is very very to sad!! It's very true.. I live in Wyoming I am also 17, and BI sexual.. I came out to my parents, but they told me not to come out in Public in fear of discrimination! I had come out the day before Matt Shepard! I did tell some freinds, but not every one! I understand what your son went through, and just wanted to say IM very sorry for what has happend! Im sorry this had to happen to your family! it's very sad! I have lived in Spokane for 4 years, It suprises me that people are like tha in Washington! I am traveling to Seattle next week, and hoping to enjoy the differant kinds of people! with regards Jon

Name: Terry Simpson
Referred by: AOL
From: Alexandria, VA
Time: 1999-03-08 03:35:06
Comments: Losing your son must have been a loss beyond words. You have communicated well to those of us in the rest of America what Bill lived for and what he died for. I am moved, as a 38 year old gay man who tried to kill myself on my 19th birthday because I was gay, that you and your husband decided that a memorial to Bill would be your own lives. That is borne out, I can tell, just by your love for your son, your actions to care for him, and your actions to heal yourselves and to keep giving from his life to the future of gay people, bi people, and the larger community. I found your website from ihave.org's which I found because of Matt Shepard's death and now Billy Jack Gaither's in Alabama. It's not over, but it's really down to one life and heart and mind at a time. Thank you for all you have done.

Name: Caitlin
Referred by: Yahoo!
From: Cincinnati, Ohio
Time: 1999-03-07 21:03:51
Comments: i really feel bad about tyour son and how he was treated. I was doing a project in religion on hate crimes and i came upon this story. I feel so awful for your family and I wish that I could do something about all of the hate there is in the country today! There are so many people out there who are treated unfairly and I hope that I can someday make a difference!

Name: Yoshinori Arai
Website: White Ribbon Campaign Japan
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: Tokyo, Japan
Time: 1999-03-07 18:03:49
Comments: Gabi, how are you? This is Yoshinori Arai. I hope you can remember me I am sorry for not writing to you so long. I have been working for a computer company since last December. I am quite busy. I still keep working hard for my translation. Many people have been impressed by Bill's Story and your wonderful work. I am really happy that they can read Bill's Story in Japanese. I hope you have good times there. Say hello to your family. thanks for your support. Yoshinori

Name: Darrin Willoughby
Referred by: AOL
From: Atlanta Ga
Time: 1999-03-07 13:50:47
Comments: I just read Bill's story. He was a very special person I can tell. I have had a strong nagging in my heart to become involved someway to help put an end to hate crimes and to reach out to young people who may be having problems in their homes and lives due to their sexual orientation. I had years of depression and struggles. Bill was much braver than I, to be able to come out, and had the good fortune of being blessed with a supportive family. I understand completly when he said he was " tired " because I too have been, and still am sometimes " tired ". I was getting information on the hike that will be taking place when I came across Bills story. If I ever questioned taking part, I have no questions now. Will you all be taking part? The death of Matthew Shepard made me open my eyes. Your sons story has further inspired me to get off my butt and finally get involved and give back and maybe make a small difference. If we all could do this think of the effect it would have. I also belive you are right when you say the best memorial to Bill is to make changes in our lives, you can now add me to that memorial. I still dont know what agencys are here that help young people but I will know by weeks end. Thank you for sharing Bills life with me, it is our loss hes not with us. Peace and Love, Darrin

Name: Christopher Gordon
Referred by: Yahoo!
From: North Carolina
Time: 1999-03-06 16:53:11
Comments: Thank you for letting us read your story. I am a gay male in North Carolina and the increase inhate crimes has made me want to research this delimma more and more in order to come to some resolutions to this problem. We may never find a resolution or a simple solution but we must try on. These hate crimes happen to the best people, the ones whose families accept them and are living a natural life. This is what scares most heterosexuals---that we are being accepted!! Are the homophobiacs scared that we are overcoming them--well we aren't. We just want to be accepted by all. Thanks again for sharing your story--it has opened my eyes to a new line of consequences to hate crimes.

Name: Trish Franklin
Referred by: Yahoo!
From: Sydney Australia
Time: 1999-03-06 06:26:24
Comments: I was looking up hate crimes as there have been a few on the news lately.. I found your strory. It touched me deeply, and it inspires me to be an accepting and understanding parent if my children one day tell me they are gay... regards Trish Franklin

Name: Chuck Sommers
Referred by: NewsGroups
From: Madison,WI
Time: 1999-03-06 06:04:00
Comments: Hi Gabi, I reached you via the P.E.R.S.O.N. project newsletter. I am very moved by what you have been through and by what you are doing. I have also suffered from homophobia my whole life (61 years)- the self-inflicted ("internalized") kind. I came out about three years ago after repressing myself all my life and becoming suicidal due to increasingly severe depression. I am now an "activist" in many ways - have spoken to several groups, have done a tremendous amount of reading for backgroud and understanding, worked on political campaigns,(does the name "Tammy Baldwin" ring a bell?), and work every saturday morning in the summer at a table at a huge farmer's market we have here. By coincidence, I met Rhea Murray ("Journey To Moriah) and her son Bruce at a conference we had here last weekend. Thanks so much for what you are doing! We will win!!!! Chuck

Name: Debra Payne
Website: Rainbunny's Homepage (just a personal page with links) :)
Referred by: Yahoo!
From: Portland, Oregon
Time: 1999-03-05 23:55:47
Comments: What a wonderful page to come across and a very nice tribute to Bill. I'm in the process of doing an essay for school and having had many gay friends who have struggled with the ignorance and violence of those who would rather hurt then understand, and I stopped in to read your story. I was moved beyond words and just had to say thank you for sharing this very painful part of your lives. My very best friend died of AIDS five years ago and I will never forgethow he asked me if I thought God would let him into heaven since he was gay. It nearly broke my heart to think he thought even God wouldn't want him in his world after so much prejudice and hatred was experienced in ours. Again, thank you. :) Debra

Name: James Whicker
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From:
Time: 1999-03-05 21:08:08
Comments: I share in your grief...I am just now suffering the effects of homophobia

Name: Jonothan Atkinson
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: Cleveland England
Time: 1999-03-05 09:52:46
Comments: I was really attacked by the emmotional input in your web page.I would like to give you my support and thank you for being able to share with others your emmotional story. As a gay young man myself I understand the hartbreak that many of us go through not that it could possibly compare to your story. I am glad that i have nether had to suffer like your son

Name: Sergio
Referred by: From a Friend
From: London, Ontario, Canada
Time: 1999-03-05 08:31:58
Comments: What's wrong with being gay/bi??? NOTHING!!!! My best friend is bi, and I still love her as much I did when I didn't know... Bill was obviouslly a very special person... I'm totally speechless... I can't control myself from crying... Humans think they are so damn perfect, if they are not gay/bi... Anyone who is gay/bi, is just like any other person... THERE IS NO DIFFERENCE... My heart goes out to your family... I can't believe people can be so ignorant and just plain stupid. But, are you ready for a surprise... I, am not gay/bi... I make a plea to humanity, OPEN YOUR EYES... We are all human... Peace, Love, and Harmony...

Name: JAY HERNANDEZ
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: WESLACO, TX
Time: 1999-03-04 19:45:49
Comments: I AM SO DEEPLY SORRY ABOUT YOUR SON. I AM GAY AS WELL. I AN HAVING A HARD TROUBLE WITH MY MOTHER ACCEPTING ME. SHE TREATS ME DIFFERENT KNOW AND I JUST SOMETIMES WANT TO RUN AWAY. I DO HAVE A BOYFRIEND, BUT HE LIVES LIKE 15 HOURS AWAY ( IT'S A LONG DISTANT RELATION. WE PLAN TO MEET BUT ARE PARENTS THNK OTHER WISE. IF THEY ONLY KNEW THAT BY THE ACTIONS THEY ARE DOING, THEY ARE PUSHING US AWAY FROM THEM AND GETTING US CLOSER TOGETEHR. I REALLY LOVE HIM AND I CAN'T IMAGINE LIFE WITHOUT HIM. YOUR SONS STORY MADE ME CRY. HE WAS SO YOUNG AND HAD HIS WHOLE LIFE AHEAD OF HIM. I AM HONESTLY TRULEY AND SADLY SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS. HE LOOKED LIKED A GREAT PERSON TO BE AROUND WITH. A SON IS EVERYTHING TO A MOTHER. I KNOW, BECAUSE THATS HOW I WAS WITH MY OWN MOTHER BEFORE I TOLD HER THAT I WAS GAY. SHE TOLD ME THAT SHE WISHED I HADN'T HAD TOLD HER THAT I WAS GAY, BUT I HAD TO. AND I AM GLAD THAT I DID. MY HEART IS RELIVED AND I AM NOT SCARED ANYMORE. I KNOW WHAT I WANT AND SHE CAN'T TELL ME OTHERWISE. I AM 18 YEAR OLD AND I HOPE TO BECOME A MODEL. WITH GODS HELP I THINK I CAN. WELL THANKS FOR LISTENING AND I'LL KEEP YOUR SON IN MY PRAYERS. I WOULD BE HONORED IF YOU COULD WRITE ME. I NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO. I TALK TO MY BOYFRIEND EVERY NIGHT, BUT IT SEEMS THAT HE CAN'T RELATE TO WHAT I WANNA SAY. NO OTHER ROAD, NO OTHER WAY, NO DAY BUT TODAY - JAY HERANDES

Name: Sarah Tomczak
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: London, UK
Time: 1999-03-04 13:49:49
Comments: I am writing a piece in Sugar Magazine, Britain's best selling girl's mag, about gay teen suicide. Would you be willing to talk to me about this?? Please e:mail me or call on 0171 6646440. Thank you xx

Name: Justin Madden
Referred by: Yahoo!
From: Houston Texas
Time: 1999-03-04 05:05:18
Comments: I myself have found Matthews story one of many problems. I like many peolpe have gone through all these problems, but to every body we just need to keep our heads up.

Name: Vance M. Greenfield
Referred by: SimpleNet
From: PO Box 777 Colmesneil Texas 75938
Time: 1999-03-02 21:40:16
Comments: I read the bill's story and relized how lucky I am. A lot of it reminded me of my own coming out. I am now 70 years old and have had a good life and life partner for over 43 years. i has been great having some one to share my life with. Have faced all the bad and came out all right and feel it is a shame that Bill will never know how good gay life can be. I have been very fortunate. Vance M. Greenfield

Name: Kat Zappavigna
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: West Lafayette, IN
Time: 1999-03-02 17:05:00
Comments: Wow...I am speechless after reading Bill's story. I co-president of Purdue's LesBiGay Networked and surfed in looking for resources to use for my organization. I found that. I also found another reason why I do this on a daily basis....

Name: Dr. Ted Davis
Website: welcome to the Order of Essenes
Referred by: Signing another Guestbook
From: Atlanta, GA
Time: 1999-03-01 20:20:03
Comments: I am a bisexual man who has survived may of the tortures of this world and have dedicated much of my life and my ministry to helping those who will come after me not to have to suffer the same injustices.

Name: Nathan Little
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From:
Time: 1999-03-01 13:28:17
Comments: Like Bill, I too have been hospitalised for severe depression and suicidal tendencies because of my homosexuality. I have dealt with drug abuse on many levels and have fought long and hard to try to scramble out of it. I don't know why I am still here, but through the grace of God somehow I have found the strength. We don't deserve to die, especially don't deserve to be killed. But most importantly, we don't deserve to deny ourselves the right to live. The world could be so wonderful for everyone. So easily. Fight.

Name: katrina
Website: Southpawcats
Referred by: Tripod
From: okla
Time: 1999-02-28 14:01:25
Comments: I found you from the Stop the Hate page from Classic Cafe site, My heart goes out to you. Bill sounds like he was a very special person. Very sad. May his spirit live on in your heart for strength. katrina

Name: MIYAH MANNING
Website: COMPUSERVE
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: MERIDEN,CT
Time: 1999-02-28 04:19:43
Comments: THESE HORRIBLE HATE CRIMES MUST STOP.WHEN WILL ALL TYPES OF PEOPLE BE ACCEPCTED?????WHEN?????? WHEN WILL YOU PUT DOWN YOUR WEAPONS WHICH IS NO GUN, NO BOMB, NOR FIST. YOUR WEAPON IS YOUR UNEDUACTED MIND. WHEN WILL YOU OPEN YOUR MINDS AND PUT DOWM YOUR WEAPONS. WHAT WILL YOU DO IF YOUR SON OR DAUGHTER TOLD YOU THRY WERE GAY WOULD YOU KILL THEM. OPEN YOUR EYES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!OPEN YOUR EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!OPEN YOUR EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!OPEN YOUR EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!OPEN YOUR EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!OPEN YOUR EYES.

Name: Angi Diehl
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: Hot Springs, AR
Time: 1999-02-28 03:47:25
Comments: Your story touched my heart. As a 24 year old lesbian living in Arkansas, I can relate to the closed mindedness of individuals. It saddens me to know that people can hurt other people just because of who they are. I am a lesbian and I am happy with that. Who I chose to love shouldn't reflect on me as a person. I am someone's daughter, and possibly in the future someone's mother. Thank you for sharing Bill's story. My best to you and your family!

Name: Ivy
Website: Wildlife's Safari
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: Trinidad, West Indies/NYC/and a world that is filled with WAY too much HATE! :o(
Time: 1999-02-27 15:46:31
Comments: Hi, I wanted to say to your family how sorry i am that you lost your son to such horrible things. It's funny that he is my age at the time of his death and when you think aobut it, he still is. And we are both have to deal with the fact that we are gay. In someways he's a bit luckier than I for he had the courage to "come out", whereas I am scared beyond belief of what might happen and probably will. Now i have the courage to be out at school but the hard part is dealing with the parents. It seems like they are to me what those four guys were to your son. I would really like to extend all my help which isn't very much and let you guys know that there are lots of people out there who really support you all. And if there is anythign i can do to help, feel free to e-mail me. And thanks for including that little statement that he drew in his nate book, "This is not my choice. This is not forced upon me. This just is." It was very helpful. I might even include the drawing in my photo album on my page if it's okay with you. Again thank you so much and keep in mind God is watching over him now and he's smiling at us all! --Love always, Ivy

Name: GG Bailey
Website: Birth
Referred by: Just Surfed On In
From: Born, Richmond, VA Live in San Jose, CA
Time: 1999-02-26 22:44:08
Comments: Gabi - I came by your website as I was seraching through adoption links. Seems there is an adoptee, a gay man who also is linked to your site. I can not tell you how much your story tuoched me, thank you for sharing your sons breif life with us all. The thing that touched me so deeply ammount and support your family had for one another. Had that been the case in my home, my brother would not be in jail and our very beloved step mother would not be in the ground. It seems that over the years Jonathan had found he was transgendered or possibly gay/bi. My father was very strict and abusive, this is why I left when I was only 7 only to visit every other weekend. My father is also very homophobic andso is VA. When he was 14 he was arrested for breaking and entering. He was considered sucidail and taken to a local hospitail much like the one where your son recived treatment. The truth about what was going on in his mind never came out then it was just considered teenage blues. We never understood why Jonathan was so mean to us, he literaly beat the hell out of us. It was as if Dad had stopped hitting us and Jonathan had taken over. But with both parents working, and my dad being a very closed in person, it never came out. Until one day when he was 15, he walked into their bed room with two 32 loaded pistols in his hand. It the day after my birthday. He had plans to kill the entire household, luckily one of my brothers and myself had stayed at our grandparents house to help with remodling. He shot and killed my stepmother, injured my father with three bullets, and pistol whipped our then 9 year old brother. It seems he had plans to kills us all dead, and leave the house, then the state to live out his life as a woman. Why do I tell you all this? Because I can see you have confronted the pain, and the reality of your son's tragedies. And that you were able to accept his sexuality as it should be done. Because you have healed. My family will never heal, they lie to themselves. My mother who has been in astring of abusive realtionships reports that she recently tried to commit sucide. I have since all of this moved to CA, I have been here two years now. I love it, I love my life and the people in it dearly. I have also found myself to be bisexual, and i am lucky to have supportive freinds and a even more supportive comunity. As I said at the beganing, I was surfing through adoption links. I am 22 years old, and I recently meet a great man this past October. Things were going very well, we were taking it one day at a time, learning and growing. In January I found myself ot be pregnant. He is still here with me and wants to keep the child. Yet I find myself worried because it was not picture prefect, because of my age, income level, and how long he and I have been together. I am seriously considering giving this child up. Because I see my own hardships growing up, and my brothers's as being the fault of our parents. They both came from abusive homes, and married at 17 because mom was pregnant. I want to break the cycle, I don't want to be ANY PART of the cycle, ever again. Yet the pain of giving my child up, of depriving the father of his child, of not be able to have a hand in molding them ( I so want to be a parent like you and your husband are!) daily, is more huge than even all of my words can express. It makes me wonder if I will ever be fit to have a child. And here I am sure you are ready to ask again, why do I say all of this to you? Because your son's most beautiful story make me remember the thing no one alows me to have in my life everyday. The thing I am supposed to "just go on" about as if it did not happen. I lost someone dear to me to bullets, and I lost what was left of my family in the process. And now I am considering the loss of my child, and once again I am expected to just go on, as if it did not happen. It is good to see that SOMEONE, has learned how to face the healing. Again, I thank you for your story. Though it maybe sad, it speak of hope. Of many hopes. Hopes to banish the ignorance against non hetrosexual peoples, ( I was told in VA, that I needed to focus more on males by counslersin school. I never spoke of it again. I also have a 15 year old freind, back in VA who has come out of the closet, she is fighting very hard to sruvive, but I fear she may end up like Bill, she has tried in the past, for the excat same reasons. She does not want to live in aworld where she has no place, where she is not safe. At least Bill was SAFE at home, I fear my Davin is not.) And Hope for healing andunderstanding. it may take a long time a very long time, but maybe the world will one day learn to face the scary things, the diffrent people, and the difficult moments. Thank you for your time and listening, and space to wirte. I may have needed it more than even I can know. May you and yours be Blessed all your days. Chriss/GG Bailey.

Name: Gabi
Website: An index of all the Responses to Bill's Story, and other related pages...
Referred by: Tripod
From: Olympia, WA
Time: 1999-02-26 21:03:57
Comments: This new guestbook was started on 2/26/99. I have a webpage with links to all the response pages, many other guestbook pages, and the pages related to "Bill's Story" -- see the link above. There is a limit to the size of entries, so if you have a lot to say it may cut off a part. You can send me a response in e-mail and ask me to post it on the Response pages if you wish. Thank you for visiting my website, for taking the time to respond, and for all your support. Love, Gabi